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Welcome to Dupage Mamas! This blog is a place for Mamas to connect, share their experiences, and recommend great finds and ideas (or let us learn from your mistakes!) If you are raising kids in Dupage County, then we'd love to have you along for the adventure!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Mom of the Year

Well, sorry to disappoint y'all, but I am fairly sure that I have won "Mom-of-the-Year" this year. I mean, it is all over the news. Have you seen the footage?

Farrah Brown wins Mom of the Year
(I am kidding, of course.)

I was recently sent an award of sorts, a bloggy-award. This particular award came with some very specific rules that should be followed if you want to play along. In the spirit of building community and honestly sharing a little with y'all about my motherhood journey, I would love to share with you my responses.

(1) Admit one thing you feel awful about involving being a mom. Get it off your shoulders. Once you've written it down, you are No Longer allowed to feel bad. It's over with, it's in the past. Remember, you're a good mom!

I feel awful every time I let my emotions and fatigue get the best of me. I am not always good at controlling my emotional outbursts when my 3 yr old or increasingly my 9-month old frustrate me. My toddler really knows how to push my buttons and I often think I expect too much from him emotionally and behaviorally. He is extremely verbal and I often mistake that for maturity. He is still only 3 and learning about his world and his actions. But, it is hard for me not to let his whining and disobedience get me all flustered. I yell too much. I hate it when I yell. It makes me feel truly awful. I try to keep calm and not let it get to me, and I am learning and getting better. But, I still have a lot of room for improvement.

2) Remind yourself you are a good mom. List seven things you love about your kids, you love doing with your kids, or that your kids love about you. These are the things to remind yourself everyday so you know that you Rock!

I love when my 3yr. old tells me he loves me, which he does several times a day. I love that he feels so comfortable expressing his affection for me. I hope it lasts and our relationship continues to grow. I also love when he says, "Oh, Mommy...." in that tender way. So sweet!

I love the way my baby's face lights up when we catch each other's eyes. He has the most expressive eyes and they brighten right up when he sees his mommy.

I love to take my boys on walks in the wagon and see them interacting and playing together. I love watching the 3yr. old hug and love on his brother, even if it is a little too rough sometimes. I can't wait for them to grow up as each other's greatest playmate and friend.

I love holding them close in the sling and feeling their bodies relax and sink into me, knowing they are totally safe and completely connected to me.

I love that my 3yr. old wants Mommy to sit by him and rub his legs and sing "Jesus Songs" to help him fall asleep. I get annoyed sometimes that I can't just chill on the couch. But then I remind myself that he won't always want me to sit with him and I should cherish it while I can.

I love watching my boys be just boys- exploring, letting their creativity and curiosity drive them. I am excited that warmer weather is here and we can start going on nature hikes and play in the dirt. I love watching them go crazy with paint or crayons (and yes, I have let my 9month old paint). I feel like it is these moments when their true personality comes out and they aren't so constricted and "parented." I wish life had more of those moments.

I love that my boys are growing up knowing that they are actually sons #2 and #3 and that their oldest brother is in heaven with Jesus. I love that they will look forward to heaven so they can be with Jesus too and meet their brother who died before they were born. I love that my 3yr old expressed grief and longing for his brother and that talking about him is just a natural part of our lives.

Motherhood is hard. I think we can all agree about that. We don't always do it perfectly. I know I am not always the mother I wish I was to my boys. I fail them daily. But I also love them with my whole self and would stop the world from turning if they asked me to. And I try to daily remind myself that my deep, deep love for them covers a multitude of frustrated moments of less-than-ideal mommy behavior. As we approach Mother's Day, let's all remind ourselves that we are good moms who are daily putting our family's needs above our own. We give selflessly to our children, not because we have to but because we choose to.
If you want to play along and answer part or all of these questions, this award is for you too. You are all the Mom of the Year. Share your answers in the comments or in an e-mail or on your own blog.

And it wouldn't be Mother's Day without a gift, right? If you play along and join in this conversation, you will be entered to win this beautiful fresh-water pearl bracelet from a really wonderful company called Narimon (we will be sharing more about their ministry soon). I will choose a winner at random next Friday. Please share part of your motherhood journey with us and let's encourage each other. If we share this task of mothering our kids together, it will make the road easier for us.


CanCan (MomMostTraveled) May 7, 2009 at 9:38 AM  

I'm guilty of losing control of my emotions, letting my irritation show. One of my kids in particular is a continual exercise in patience.
Remind yourself you are a good mom. List seven things you love about your kids, you love doing with your kids, or that your kids love about you:
1. I like it when my kids run out of the house to meet me when I get home.
2. I like watching them grow and learn new things.
3. I love the way my kids make my laugh (usually) many times each day.
4. I love watching them have those occasional tender moments as brothers.
5. I love when I discover a new aspect of their personalities.
6. It is really amazing watching my 4 1/2 year old learning to read.
7. I love watching the way their daddy loves them, and they love their daddy! :)

melanie May 11, 2009 at 2:52 PM  

i hate to sound cliche (i mean, i really do) but i hate myself for not staying patient no matter what else is going on. case in point, this morning i was trying to get everyone out the door on time for the bus: why couldn't i do that lovingly and patiently? maybe if i got more sleep...

1. i love watching my kids play together (at least for the five minutes they aren't arguing).
2. i love when they try to sound like adults but they use the wrong words.
3. i like when they want to help me with stuff instead of doing their own thing. i know this won't last.
4. i like when they get excited about little things like a candy after dinner.
5. i love watching them move: my son just started galloping and is so proud. my daughter is skipping.
6. i love reading to them and the concentration they have for the stories.
7. i love watching them sleep.

Miss Kita May 12, 2009 at 3:58 PM  

My biggest guilt? Spending too much time doing "stuff" and not enough time spending time. In about 90 days, all three of my children will be in school full time...for the first time in 10 years, I won't have someone at home to be cared for during that long school day. And I worry that in all the time we shuttled or parked in front of the tv, etc...not enough special times were had.

1. I love that my kids hear "I love you" all the time.

2. I love that sense of pride about every little accomplishment.

3. I love the dorky handmade gifts that come home each mother's day, and the hideous mother's day presents my husband allows them to buy me.

4. I love that my kids are growing up with strong character -- even if they ARE characters.

5. I love that they will still confide in me, come to me for comfort and let me snuggle.

6. I love that they think I'm a great "cooker" even though I'm a terrible chef.

7. I love that darling giggle they give when they're being tickled.

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